I did it! Okay, technically, WE did it.

Today has loomed over my head for about a week now. Our team was scheduled to run our first 5K Saturday but with conflicting schedules and rain, we had to postpone. I was a little disappointed because I have hit my two week mark of staying off my feet and not running, and I have been anxious to get back out there. But I was also a little relieved. I have found myself nervous about my first time back out there and this gave me at least one more day of rest. Now granted, I haven't been taking it completely easy. I did swim for a week, rode a stationary bike, and Friday, I finally got back on my elliptical, but nothing compares to getting outside and running. So we rescheduled to run today but unfortunately, Robin woke up sick and we knew we weren't going to be able to run as a team this week. That really stinks because I was very ready to see my teammates and run with them. But, alas, not meant for today. So Jerod and I decided to go run just the two of us at a local high school track. On the way, I couldn't believe that I actually had butterflies in my tummy just like I did before a competitive run in middle school. It just was still so clear to me how bad it hurt last time I ran outside on the payment. But I was prepared with my brace on and my ipod, so there was no backing out. Let's just get this straight...my expectations for myself were WAY too high. I knew that I probably wouldn't make the whole 3 miles without stopping but I did expect to make it at least a few laps before I had to walk. Well....I did make it 2 laps without stopping but realized very quickly how not running for these few weeks was going to affect my progress. My ankles were not hurting and the first two times Jerod lapped me didn't bother me but I was having trouble getting into a rhythm trying to keep up with him. So after about half way through, I knew keeping up with him had to go out the window and I just had to do the best I could do. I got into the rhythm where I ran about 3/4 of the way around and then walked the straight away that was against the wind. Jerod lapped me one more time and finished when I had 3 more laps to go. I almost caved then and quit 3 laps short but he came and started running with me. THAT is why I love team runs. If I had tried to do this all by myself, I would have talked myself into quitting a lot sooner but when I had my teammate next to me cheering me on, it gave me the extra boost I needed. It was in those last 3 laps that I quit thinking about how many laps I had left and how hard it was and I started thinking about the people I was doing this for. I thought about those African people who would benefit, and I thought about my dear friend, Joni, who physically can't run. Oh how she would love to be with us, but right now, a fierce disease has made many physical things incapable for her. But she tells me all the time how she believes in me and hearing her voice in my head was all I needed to keep going. Then God blessed me. I was one lap away from finishing and my all time favorite song came on my ipod. "I Am Free" by Newsboys. For those who don't know the song, the chorus goes a little like this, "I am free to run, I am free to dance, I am free to live for you, I am free!" As it played the last lap, ringing in my ears, I was reminded how wonderful it is to be able to be free. Truly free. Not held down by sin or the world, but truly free to live this life for my Savior. And then I finished. All 12 laps...3 miles. And I had conquered it. I can say that I did it. I didn't let fear win, and I allowed God to show himself to me in a way that I would have missed had I not been out there.

I am beginning to get the feeling that this training experience will really grow me in ways I never thought possible. Physically, yes (well, maybe not...Jerod did buy me a surprise Reese's peanut butter cup as a congratulations...glad my goal isn't to lose weight) but spiritually as well. As long as I get out there and allow Him to speak to me. My friend Karen, an experienced marathoner, had told us that this marathon was very mental as well as physical and I think she definitely knows what she's talking about. But if it's going to be game that's in my head, I'm so glad I have God in there with me. : )